3 Tips For Your Feminist Wedding

As a proud feminist wedding photographer, I see that many weddings are rooted in antiquated tradition. I am certainly not suggesting that you throw everything out of the window for the sake of rebellion, but I do encourage my couples to interrogate the parts of the day. Ask yourself: ‘why’ or ‘do we really want it?’ on parts of the wedding day that are so often assumed. This is part of my 'how to plan a wedding series' - you can check out other blogs here.

It’s worth reiterating that there is absolutely no right or wrong way to get married, and there is every reason to tick all the traditions as long as it sits right with you! 

What is a feminist wedding?

After a lot of thought, my definition is simple: a wedding that celebrates everyone equally, and actively rejects patriarchal traditions and tropes. 

3 Tips for Your Feminist Wedding:

Being Given Away: Can you reframe this idea? If you’re walking down the aisle with your Dad, is he there because he’s giving you over to your partner? Or is he supporting your decision to commit yourself to another person? 

Only Men Speaking: The Big Three traditionally are the Best Man, Groom and Father of the Bride. Are these the ‘best’ people to speak about you and your life/ relationship? Are there some better suited people amongst your guests list? As a feminist wedding photographer I have seen so many women (often Mums) dread the idea of speaking, but often give the best speeches! We won’t break this pattern of women feeling it isn’t their place to speak until we have more representation at places like weddings. 

Equal Parts You: I’m sure you have experienced heaps of heteronormative language. Perhaps assumptions that one of you is ‘more important’ on the day than the other.  Perhaps one of you have the single job of ‘turning up’, while the other has planned the whole day? Are you able to start a dialogue if / when this language comes up in conversation around planning your wedding? This will ensure the whole day is equally about each other and the celebration of your beautiful love story.

I love hearing about feminist ideas about weddings so please get in touch to discuss more! There're also loads of blogs, articles and pins out there.